"Just Keep Your Arse in the Middle of the Road and You'll Do Fine..."

This is me on April 8th, 2011 at The Nun's Chapel, ClonMacNoise, Co. Westmeath, Ireland.  I am utterly alone with the rocks, moss and ruins.  I love this picture because I feel happy, content and victorious.  It is my first non-jet-lagged day in Ireland (so I was feelin' happy) and I had driven a good 45 minutes without killing myself or any unsuspecting Irish folk (that's the victorious part).  Praise the Lord!  I am also victorious because all of my joy,dreaming, planning, excitement, nervousness, joy, dread and joy again had finally come to fruition.  I do lots of dreaming and planning but not always with results, sadly. 

I named her "Silver Bullet" (Perry's like to name their cars). 

The six months of planning was fierce.  I love planning.  I love mapping out every single scenerio - looking at all my options - and then picking the best one.  It drives Tak nuts - but lucky for him he wasn't involved in the planning of this one, so lucky for me I got to visit and re-visit every single detail ad nauseum (and I did!).  There was, of course, the itinerary.  Thinking about the itinerary led me to how I was to be going about said itinerary.  I researched public transport but the small town  where the karate camp was being held, Portumna, didn't have a lot of options.  That left either walking and staying REALLY local or driving.  I took a deep breath and chose to drive.  My dad was teaching the entire time he was there- it would just be me out and about during the day.  So there was the rental car reservations, the hotel reservations, buying my UK map for my TomTom and making sure my navigator had the proper Irish accent (that was important!)  I looked at my passport at least 20 times to make sure it was valid, it was good, that was my picture, it wasn't expired.  That would be the one thing that could just wash this whole trip down the toilet -so I obsessed .



These were my boots.  They are pretty beat up now.
They came home covered in Irish soil with a
bit of Shannon River muck (for good luck!)



But in truth what I spent the most time doing was planning what I was going to pack.  I knew I was taking my Mom's Brighton luggage - I wanted her along.  She would've/should've been on this trip and she would have used her fancy luggage.  Unfortunately, her fancy luggage was carry-on sized and I got it in my head that for the 3 weeks I was gone I would only use a carry-on.  I have my crazy moments and totally own this one as being one of them.  However, there was a certain joy in finding the perfect single pair of shoes to take.   And the best three pairs of pants (my Lucky Sweet and Lows were top on the list as they were comfortable and had shamrocks on them!)  I also wore my Mom's high school class ring - she went everywhere I went.

I also got lots of advice:

Most un-needed:  "Tell everyone your Canadian"  The Irish really like Americans!  Well, you know....

Most contradictory - "Get a tattoo.  It's Ireland!"  "For heavens' sake do not get a tattoo, it's Ireland!"

Most practical:  "A water resistent coat will just not cut it - you MUST go waterproof."  I listened but never wore it as it was sunny the entire time.  I was lucky.

Most Gastronomical:  "When at the pub, order the soup and bread.  It's good, everything else is crap."  Nothing compares to Irish Soda bread in Ireland and they do make a very fine soup.

BEST ADVICE:  While in Flat Rock, visiting one of those shops that Mom and I would frequent, I was chatting with a shop lady who happened to be from Co. Cork.  I told her I was planning to be driving in Ireland and asked if she had any advice for me.  She said, "Absolutely!  Keep your arse in the middle of the road and you'll do fine."  I had to think about that for a bit and picture what she was saying but I got it!  and it settled in! and it made me a driving machine!  That might be taking it too far but it did give me more confidence and was what saved me (and many Irish innocents) from certain death.  That key point made driving in Ireland fun (and it was fun!)  When I was turning the car all I had to think about was making sure that I (the driver) ended up driving in the middle-side of the road not the outside. I must have repeated that line to myself a million times over there but what spot-on advice.  I injured no one!

Thanks for reading!

I swear we will get on a plane next post -  even set foot on Irish soil.